Genre Wars…I Cannot Think of a Clever Title, So Fuck You.

As I often do, I spent some time this morning before work reading John Darnielle’s blog Last Plane to Jakarta, a blog about a little bit of everything. One of those everything’s that John likes to write about is music, and John is an unapologetic metal fan, which is odd considering the fact that John is a folk music icon, not metal.

I always feel out of place reading these because, frankly, I am not a metal fan at all. Call me dumb, but I just do not get it, despite trying my best to get into just about every form of metal created. Countless times, on a whim, I’ve downloaded entire Cannibal Corpse, Frostmoon, or Nile albums and found myself trying to force myself to listen and understand why so many people I know are obsessed with these bands, and every time I end up either confused, annoyed, or forced to listen to an Apples in Stereo album to clense my palate.

Honestly though, I do respect metal for the most part. While I dislike, I realize that most of the bands are technical talents, even if they all sound like emotionless robots to me. And I do happen to enjoy stoner metal, mainly based on my love of psychadelic rock and blues music.

And I do understand the purpose of metal: who doesn’t need some really pissed off, angry music every now and then? Or when you’re a teenager, music to piss off your parents. All of these are legit, despite what some critics say. And it’s why I listen to hardcore punk, at least the pissed off music part. Plus, as a fan of neofolk, I realize that most of those neofolk bands I like are incredibly influenced by metal, and some of them even influence folk metal bands.

What the whole point of this is, is to say that while it’s okay to dislike certain genres of music, I do think that you should at least be able to respect stuff that you don’t like. Metal isn’t my cup of tea, but I do give it credit for what it does right. It’s one of the things that sticks in my craw about being a fan of both “indie” music and “punk” music, that fans of both are snobbish assholes that won’t listen to anything that doesn’t give them enough street cred. Any time I express my love of a mainstream rock band like Zwan or Ben Folds, some smug asshole wearing clothes bought exclusively at thrift stores, and headphones that are 4 sizes too big, will feel the need to chime in about how anything that gets radio play inherently sucks.

It’s not just the indie world that does it, though. Most fans of rock music will scream bloody murder if someone tells them that rap really is a legitimate genre of music, and while I don’t listen to it, I agree that it is. I mean, you’ll never see me listening to a Tupac album, but I realize the brilliance of the man. And fans of mainstream pop music would never be caught dead listening to even a Ted Leo and the Pharmacists album, all because they’ve never used a Ted Leo song on Rob and Big.

However, there is one genre that I will flatout attack and refuse it’s worthiness as music, and that is modern mainstream country. Do not misunderstand what I am saying here, I have no qualms with country, and not just in the “well, I like Johnny Cash” way. There’s a lot of great country out there today, but not the garbage being played on the radio. I love Julie Holland, The Watson Twins, William Elliott Whitmore, and others. But modern mainstream country like Toby Keith, Kenny Chesny, and whatever else is just pure crap. And I say this because I work on a farm and am forced to listen to this shit all day.

It’s basically just mainstream pop music with banjos, and without the self-awareness of how unbelievably shitty it is. At least most mainstream pop acts realize how trite and dull their music is, and that it’s only being made for shitty parties and bar sluts. But mainstream country has a horrible sense of self-importance, and a fake sense of macho, which makes no sense given the fact that it may be the whiniest genre I’ve ever heard, and I listen to sadcore. To put it thusly, any music that sounds like it should be in a Ford commercial? Not worth your time.

Now listening to: The Moon Lay Hidden Beneath a Cloud- A Night in Fear